Finding my husband's last wishes in his Nutshell was a great comfort
My husband and I had certainly never talked about dying, so his short illness and death took me completely by surprise. I was flailing around looking for something personal and special as a crumb of comfort - and it was then that his solicitor produced the details of his Nutshell. I had no idea he'd done this - maybe he had an inkling about his illness after all.
It was such a comfort to find that all the arrangements I'd made were exactly as he would have wished - although I didn't realise he'd go so far as to suggest his favourite hymn for the service. But in fact it made it even more significant singing this slightly chirpy, singalong number knowing he'd chosen it personally probably to cheer me up!
I was able to make one or two gifts of his personal things to people he'd marked out and the personal messages he'd left were a huge comfort to the family - and sparked off some happy memories when we talked about them later.
I've already done my own Nutshell because it's such a great thing to find if you're mourning a family member - and I think I'll also start a diary as well so I can share my everyday life with him in a way.
It's easy to think you'll live forever when you're young.
But now we have a growing family, we realise it's vital to put our affairs in order; if one of us is taken ill, the other will know where everything is and what to do.
But my grandchildren have been interviewing me on their phones and on video, and now they've recorded my memories in a Nutshell - I can't wait to see it.
Lots of things are hard to talk about - at any age.
But now we've recorded our last wishes we can get on with enjoying retirement together, knowing that those left behind will have greater peace of mind.
